The truth is, I will always be a therapist. I never set out to be a consultant. It's interesting sometimes, the journey life takes. Sometimes there is a higher purpose and path to each of our lives, something bigger guiding us.
Since I first wrote this in 2015
Kelly Higdon and I have kept building zynnyme, which we started together in 2010. We've now coached over 2,000 therapists through our private practice coaching and consulting, built Business School for Therapists, co-authored Therapist Burnout, and co-host the Starting a Private Practice podcast. The story below is still the one underneath all of it.
How I got here: failing my licensing exam by one point
My journey to becoming a consultant started by failing a licensing exam by one point. It was heart-wrenching and mortifying. I couldn't have imagined how many amazing things would come out of that experience:
- I learned a ton about who I was.
- I became a better therapist.
- I stepped into a role as a leader.
- I created a study group that has helped thousands of therapists from around the United States for more than 20 years.
- I became acutely aware of how silly the process was when, several months later, the board realized there was a problem with the exam and sent me a letter saying I had passed.
Everything happens for a reason
I truly believe that every one of your experiences, frustrations, and fears, all of your life, is preparing you for the present and the future. Every time someone tells you your dream isn't feasible, you're simply standing at a crossroads where you choose who you will be. You'll either choose to go forward into your purpose no matter what anyone says, give up, or develop a clearer picture of what you're really meant for.
Every obstacle is an opportunity
I have been at that crossroads. I've sat in the struggle of it more times than I can count. Here are just a few of the opportunities I had to give up:
- Being told for years by classmates and professors that I was a terrible writer and my work was unreadable
- Failing my licensing exam
- My husband losing his job (more than once) while I was in private practice
- People telling me they wouldn't refer to me until I got on insurance panels
- People publicly judging me and implying that offering faith-based counseling was unethical, unprofessional, and made me a bad therapist
- My husband being offered an amazing opportunity in another state, which meant I needed to close my caseload and stop seeing clients
- People publicly saying that zynnyme was an unnecessary venture, meant only to make money
Obstacles are hard for a reason
Every obstacle challenged me to get stronger. Each one challenged me to get clearer about why I was doing what I was doing. It was an opportunity to let the doubts come to the surface, really explore who I was, and become at peace with my path. It forced me to check in and ask: is this REALLY what I'm meant to be doing in this moment?
Clarity is a powerful tool
I am clear about my purpose. I am clear about what I'm supposed to be doing in this moment. Are you? Have you given yourself permission to dig deep, look at the fears, and step into whatever your path is, no matter how hard it is? No matter how many people question your abilities, your motives, or your truth?
What is my path?
My path is to educate, inspire, and equip therapists to go and change the world. My path is to help psychotherapy experience a revival in our culture, sparked by hundreds and then thousands of therapists getting real messages, based on truth, out into the world. I know that every therapist I can help connect with the clients who need them, and do transformational work, makes our world a better place.
There are too many therapists ready and willing to make change in the world sitting in empty rooms. There are too many therapists hiding their expertise in rooms with their caseload, when their passion needs to live beyond them.
What is your path?
What are you meant to be doing right now? What are you meant to be doing in three months? Take a moment and write it down. Get SUPER clear, and keep tweaking it until your vision vibrates with every fiber of your being, even if that clarity brings up a ton of fear, anxiety, and questions.
If you're not sure whether you need outside support to get there, start with our guide, do you need a private practice consultant? And if you'd like help turning that vision into a practice that actually holds it, here's how we can work together.
